If fairytales have taught us anything, it’s that the lovely, long-haired and excessively feminine princess stuck in a castle can’t wait for that moment when a big, tough, burly prince will come charging onto the grounds and whisks her faraway. Off they’ll go into the sunset, like something out of The Princess Bride, and they’ll live happily ever after: the masculine burly man and his dainty feminine lady.
Sorry to burst your bubble, you guys, but fairytales are lies. Lies I tell you! When was the last time you had hair long enough to dangle from a tower as a means to get a fella into your bedroom? And have you ever made out with a frog that turned into a knight in shining armor? If so, then awesome! But maybe you should lay off the drugs.
Despite what stories, films, novels and even music have taught us, not all women are looking to be swept off their feet by some overly masculine guy who stares fearlessly into the face of danger, and scoffs at the thought of being defeated. In fact, masculine dudes out there, in the real world you’re just not winning as many points as you’d like with the ladies. I’d offer you a tissue, but “real” men don’t cry, do they?
EliteSingles did some investigating to see exactly what type of men and women are most desirable by other men and women. Ready for the kicker that might make the machismo in you want to do a little soul-searching and revamping, guys?
According to the study, 76 percent of feminine women prefer feminine men when it comes to dating and eventually settling down. Sure, superheroes are great in theory, but even those tights that Superman rocked still aren’t feminine enough to make the feminine-loving ladies swoon. Perhaps, women no longer feel as though they need to be saved or protected because, honestly, we got this; we can do it on our own.
When it came to both men and women who identified themselves as being more on the masculine end of the spectrum they, too, chose to keep to their own kind of people. Fifty-nine percent of men who considered themselves “masculine” in nature found that they were attracted to those women who identified themselves the same way. Of those self-described masculine women, 68 percent of them said that when it comes to attraction, gender identity is a big part of the equation.
As Dr. Wiebke Neberich, the head of the study, pointed out that when it comes to relationships there are two theories. The first being “birds of the feather flock together,” and the one we’ve heard even more often than that, “opposites attract.” However, as Dr. Neberich also addresses it’s those “birds of a feather” that have a better chance at longer lasting relationships, because it’s “more realistic.” A healthy relationship benefits from people being understanding and supportive: men and women with similar personalities typically match better since they have similar needs, exist in a comparable emotional world, and typically perceive things in a similar way, which all help to avoid conflict.” True, but without conflict and occasional arguments, there is no make-up sex, and what fun is that?
But at the same time, who wants a masculine dude when their feminine self has them longing for a feminine man? Basically, finding THE ONE, still continues to be a complex and difficult feat to pull off, and while studies are great, at the end of the day, its all about chemistry.
