When a man with a snake who appears to be mad decides to target you, stop and ask yourself these questions:
Is he truly mad?
Why you?
Are you carrying anything valuable?
I know these questions may not easily come to your mind at that moment, escaping the madman, avoiding a snake bite will tend to be uppermost on your mind. Well not for long, especially when you discover that within that melee, you have lost a hundred grand! This happened recently to a colleague of mine and yes, here in Lagos, yes again on the island, the Victoria Island.
He had just stepped out of a bank and walked like 200 metres when he noticed a man with a snake. It looked like the man was making towards him so he decided to change direction. The man with the snake must have read his mind for at that same moment he changed direction as well and it was to the same place. This happened again and again, my colleague, Mr X become agitated and concerned as this wasn’t looking like a coincidence anymore.
Well fortunately, he didn’t feel alone as there were other seemingly scared people who were also trying to avoid the “man with the snake” as well. Soon they all started bumping each other while trying to dodge and escape the scare.
Okay, thank God that is over, they finally avoided him. Phew, what a relief, but wait a minute . . . . where is the money? Mr X “borrowed himself some brain matter” immediately. He turned while remembering all that took place awhile ago, his eyes locked on to one of the guys who until a moment ago he thought was a victim like himself. He dashed for him and straightway demanded for his money. While still blabbering as if he didn’t understand, trust my brother from the other side of the Niger, tore his shirt top down, grabbed his trousers and picked a dangerous looking stone with which he threatened to redesign his head while shouting the popular “Thief! Thief!!”
People were already gathering, the accomplices of the cornered guy quickly came to his rescue, yes you guessed right, the mad man too. The money surfaced. “Count it, is it complete?” One wonders if they knew how much was there in the first place. Well Mr X didn’t bother to count and neither pressed charges, was just glad to put some distance between himself and the crowd that had now gathered.
How did I know? Well he told the story, now I have told the story, please tell the story, so that people can be aware of the new trick in town. Did I hear say, “Lagos na wa, I swear!”
Naija, ingeniously evil!
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Folabi Williams blogs HERE
