by Jazlyn Hunt
There are a few things more precious in this world than having someone to love and cherish with all your heart, and who feels the same way as you do, without any strings attached. However, more often than not, this is far from the case. In this increasingly materialistic and selfish world, healthy relationships are no less than a needle in a haystack. Yet finding that one person who gives you their all without wanting anything in return is everyone’s dream. The quest for this other half that completes us perfectly, the other side of the coin as they say, can take people their whole lives. Fortunately, there are some basic clues that can tell you when you might be in unhealthy relationship. How much does your partner really love you? How invested are they in a future together? What can you do to turn this unhealthy relationship around? Read on to find out more!
1. TRUSTING EACH OTHER
Do you trust each other with your life? Would you close your eyes and take a leap of faith with them? If they are typing on their phone and smiling, will you be able to control your curiosity and not ask who it is? Do you wonder about those late nights at the office? The presence of any of these could be a warning sign that this is turning into unhealthy relationships. Either you’ll have to start trusting them to make the right choices on their own, and to believe that they will always be there for you, or you must realize that this relationship is not meant to be if you can’t trust each other.
2. APPRECIATION
Do you feel like your partner just expects you to do all the difficult things alone? A good relationship has balance. Both parties need to know their duties and responsibilities and should be able to appreciate the things the other person does for them. When it feels like all your effort is just being taken for granted, you know that you are in an unhealthy relationship.
3. PERSONAL SPACE AND DEVELOPMENT
If your partner expects the whole world to only revolve around them, then you are victimized by unhealthy relationships. You are allowed to have your own needs and interests that you shouldn’t feel obliged to give up for the other person’s sake. In fact, it is the sign of a healthy mind to have some personal interests which you continue to pursue alongside your relationships.
4. RESPECTING YOUR PARTNER
Once the honeymoon phase has worn off and things begin to appear more black and white, you must make sure that you respect each other and give due importance, and also try and understand your roles and treat accordingly too. Respecting your partner means that you are always mindful of what the other might be feeling and trying your best to make sure that the other one is happy, which is the key of fixing relationships.
5. BEING OPEN
A healthy relationship requires that both persons are entirely honest and open with each other about everything that they have to face together. Everything that concerns the relationship should be straight in straight forward a manner as possible and not leave the other person wondering what the real meaning behind a conversation was. If you’re not open with your partner about all the things that are important to you, then this is the sign of an unhealthy relationship.
6. ANTICIPATING YOUR PARTNER’S NEEDS
A good relationship depends upon being there for the other person when they need you the most. If you really care about a person, they shouldn’t have to tell you what they want from you. Rather, you should be able to anticipate their needs and try your best to provide for them with your time, money and energy.
7. BEING ONE
Once two people are in a relationship, it means that they are telling the world that from now on they will have a united front. If a third person can get in between you and be the cause of a divide, there is danger of it turning into unhealthy relationships. Your partner should be your best friend in the whole world and nobody should be able to mess with that.
8. FORGIVENESS
No matter how healthy your relationship is, there are still chances of improvement. People make mistakes and end up hurting their loved ones even if it is unintentional. If you want to stay clear of unhealthy relationships you must be able to forgive the other person when they make a mistake and help them make it up to you. Not only will this heal the rift but it also has the potential to strengthen your relationship.
9. LOVE
They say love is the most powerful force known to man. As far as relationships are concerned, they’re already built on love and friendship. The key to maintaining them is to focus on how and why you fell in love with the person in the first place and then to help them grow into the person that they want to be and keep on supporting them with your love, giving them all they need from you selflessly without wanting anything in return.
At the end of the day, it helps to remember that one can’t have everything in life. Relationships are about compromise and if you really love each other, that makes it all the more easier to put their needs above your own. Otherwise they turn into unhealthy relationships. The trick is to find that balance between being friends and being in love which is the secret of a healthy relationship. All this means that you must be very careful about choosing the person that you decide to spend the rest of your life with. If they come up to all the expectations that you must have from a healthy relationship then they might be a keeper. If you’re comfortable with them and think you’re ready to face life’s challenges with them by your side, then you must stick by these points to make sure that both of you find solace in each other and live your lives happily ever after.
(via OlWomen)
