[dropcap]D[/dropcap]uring those days before the wedding one sees the world with rose colored glasses and most couples feels soft and mushy for each other all the time. During this period they do not wish to or avoid talking to each other about sensitive topics or issues which they know mind break the rosy mist surrounding them. But according to experts these topics and issues which are avoided and left unsolved before marriage can be the biggest reasons because of which a marriage can fall apart.
Some of these questions may be straightforward and some might be embarrassing or awkward to ask but once they are dealt with it helps to lay a strong foundation to and long and happy wedded life. Let us see 7 of those important questions and how to frame them to get the right and the most truthful answers. Most of these questions are such that can be asked by both the boy and the girl to each other:
-
How does the family of both the boy and the girl react in case of disagreements?
It is true that children take on the good as well as bad characteristics of the parents throughout their life. The parents could be aggressive and the boy or the girl might have seen a lot of glass breaking during one of those conflict sessions or the parents might be the understanding type where every problem is sorted with a level head. By asking this question to each other the couple gets an idea how the other would react in case of a conflict or a misunderstanding in their personal relationship.
-
How about having children? Is the boy willing to take turns for nappy changing?
Now a day’s aged people avoid having children during the earlier years into their marriage but this decision should be reached upon through mutual consent which can be achieved by discussing with each other. Also child rearing is a joint responsibility and hence by asking this question, which is usually asked by the girl, couples can be sure what to do or expect from each other during those child rearing years.
-
Will their experiences with the exes dominate their relationship?
Guys, if you are planning to lead a happy married life then this question should be on top of your ‘what questions to ask a girl before marriage’. Girls are sensitive and emotional beings. If you are aware that they have been emotionally abused by their exes then it could be harmful for your relationship. Make sure to clear the air before taking any step forward.
-
How free or tight are both of them in case of financial expenditures?
Having a very tight rein or an absolute free hand in financial expenditures are extreme cases which need to be tamed for the right financial savings. It is necessary to know for both of them where does the other stand and how frivolous each of them are when it comes to spending money and when to comes to savings otherwise these could be the major causes disagreements and fights between couples.
-
Can both of them stand the company of each other parents?
This question applies to both the partners, especially in our Indian culture. As we have it a girl has to leave her parents house and settle with the boys family in their house where there interactions everyday between them. For the interactions to be smooth and harmonious it is necessary for both the parties to like each other. In the same manner the boy should be courteous to his in-laws giving them the same respect and love as he expects from his wife for his family. This question can solve the mystery whether both of them can survive the company of their in-laws or not. If they are not able to survive marriage should be loud and clear to avoid problems later.
-
What do they like and dislike about each other?
Ah!! The main and basic question where it is not easy to give a straightforward and an honest answer by both the boy and the girl. As we said earlier those are the rosiest days before marriage and neither the boy not the girl want to do or say anything to disrupt it. But it is essential to do so as it might be the smallest of things which might peev you at that time but it can become the cause of your marriage falling apart later on.
-
Do they believe in personal space?
Some couples tend to be obsessed about each other and want to be completely immersed in the other’s life whether the other person likes it or not. This can be looked upon as signs of love at first but then it might become a feeling of clinginess. The definition of personal space has be written by the couple themselves where they can reach a mutual understanding about boundaries that cannot be crossed by the other.
It is just a matter of sorting out issues which is always advisable before setting out on a journey called marriage which nevertheless has its ups and downs.
