Have you ever been completely in love with a woman, and then somehow, in some unimaginable way, you lost her? If you really want to reignite an old flame, you must know the right moves to make and the right time to make them. Here are 5 things you can do to maximize your chances.
1. Give her some space
In order to win your ex back, you need to show her a new side of you, or basically the “old you” she once fell in love with. The only way to do this is to give her some space to forget her current assessment of you, let her forget the things that impacted her decision to leave and wipe the slate clean. The amount of time needed will be based on the amount of time the two of you dated, while taking into consideration the events that transpired during the relationship.
2. Communicate with her
If you really want her back, you have to be the man and apologize for what went wrong. If she was hurt by you, she’ll want to stay away from you for fear of getting hurt again. So after some time has passed, man up and apologize in person for what you did to her. Be sincere and tell her you made a mistake. Don’t just say, “I’m sorry for everything.” Instead, apologize for whatever mistakes you made. She will appreciate this, and it will make you seem more self-aware and sincere. If she doesn’t accept your apology right away, she’s probably still working through what happened, but probably still appreciates your effort.
3. Show her how much you’ve changed
Just saying “I’m willing to change” won’t cut it. You’re ex should be able to see how much you’ve changed without you having to say it yourself. If she sees you “trying” or having some sort of agenda to get her back, you’re done! Did she complain that you never listened to her? Then be quiet and really listen to what she has to say. Subtly show her the new you, make the effort to cultivate your good qualities, suppress the bad ones, and show her that she’s worth the sacrifice.
4. Tell her how you feel and get the ball rolling
Once she can begin to see that you’re a different person and you start getting one foot back in the door, be honest and share your true feelings. If the relationship ended badly, she’s not going to ask you to start things up again, so you need to get your act together, open up and get the ball rolling. Pick a time when she’s not too busy and you can be alone and tell her that you can’t believe what an idiot you’ve been. Explain to her that she was the best thing that ever happened to you and that you really screwed up. Let her know that you would like to try again, and hopefully you’ll get the answer you were looking for.
5. Take her out and treat her right
If you’re lucky enough to get a second chance, make the most of your time together and treat her right this time! Bring her flowers, take her to a nice restaurant and turn up the romance that was probably missing before. If the date goes well, and if there are more dates to follow, look at it as starting fresh. Remind yourself what happened the last time and vow not to do it again if you really want to stay with this woman. You don’t have to rehash the old relationship, but work on building something completely new and much better.
While these are excellent tips, they are by no means foolproof. Some women think that once they dump you, it’s over and done with. So if she tells you that she’s ready to move on, just accept it, take the lessons that you’ve learned and move on. Meeting new women is a good option that will boost your confidence and could be the pathway to finding the right relationship for you.