Even though every day is only 24 hours long, some are worse than others. To get through those particularly tough ones—or just the daily struggle of balancing a nine-to-five gig, a social life, and your wellbeing—sometimes you have to fib to yourself. Here is a sampling of the little white lies most of people are totally guilty of telling themselves all the time. No shame.
1. If you don’t look at your ATM receipt, there will always be money in your bank account. Ignorance is bliss.
2. Hitting the snooze button three times on a workday won’t set you back that much. Of course you’re capable of showering, blow-drying your hair, picking out clothes, doing your makeup, and packing a lunch in 10 minutes.
3. No one smells that. ‘Nuff said.
4. You need at least two daily trips to Starbucks to function at work. No other bush-league coffee will do.
5. Happy hour is not going to stand in the way of your making it to that 6 a.m. yoga class tomorrow. You’re as committed to making it to the gym as you are to finishing your third margarita.
6. You’re totally going to make it through this workday without instant messaging, Facebooking, or searching for flights to Mexico. Why does planning a fake vacation have to be so freaking distracting?
7. Veggie chips count as a vegetable, right? Yes. Well, it has the word veggie in it.
8. You haven’t washed your hair in three days, but it’s not toonoticeable. Don’t fail us now, sock bun.
9. Today is the day that you will un-friend, un-follow, and delete your ex from all social media accounts. He’s got to go. Right after you finish going through his photos and figuring out the name of that brunette.
10. Workout pants definitely double as leggings and can be worn to the office. They’re black, stretchy, and aren’t that mistakable for gym clothes when paired with a big sweater, right? Sure.
11. This is the last week you’re going to order a pizza just because it’s Thursday. The. Last. Week.
12. No one can see you singing in your car during your commute.Your windows might as well be tinted because no one is paying attention to your rendition of “I Want It That Way.” #TBT.
13. A Netflix binge is important for your mental health. It’s like meditation, except you’re also catching up on Orange is the New Black. Multitasking.
14. It’s not weird at all that you know the high school mascot, complete dating history, and mother’s maiden name of the guy you went on a first date with yesterday. We repeat: This is verynormal.
15. Bringing your gym bag to the office pretty much guarantees you’re going to the gym tonight. You have really high hopes of working out, which is all you need. Right?
16. After this weekend, you’re giving up alcohol for at least a month. Make that after Halloween.
