Girls could easily be said the be the greatest victims of the “perfect body” image created by the Western media. Since there is no such thing as “that perfect body”, millions girls are growing up with low self esteemed occasioned by feeling inadequate. This article addresses some of these non-issues.
1. Eating
Don’t lie, you know you love to eat. With all of these fad diets, detoxes, and “fitspo” blogs it can be hard to admit that we love food. I As girls, we feel like we have to be “ladylike” when we eat and not make a mess. A lot of the time we won’t order a certain food because it is “too messy.” Please don’t deprive yourself of those ribs or wings just because you don’t want to look “unladylike.” And oh God, PLEASE don’t feel like you have to order a salad on a date when you really want pasta. Iliza Shelesinger has the right idea:
“Handful of almonds, Cosmo says go get a handful of almonds. Why don’t you go fuck yourself with a handful of almonds Cosmo, see how full you get off that. I’m a grown woman not a sugar squirrel.”
– Iliza Shlesinger, War Paint
2. Having different body shapes
We are all unique and beautiful in our own ways. Can you imagine if we all looked the exact same? That would be incredibly boring. Not only are our body shapes unique, but also what we wear, body art, and piercings. The shape of your body absolutely does not define who you are, it’s simply a shell. With that being said, it’s also okay to want to change your body. The most important thing to remember is what others say about your body should not change your own opinion about it. You alone are the only person that knows what it’s like to live in your body. Sometimes it takes years to learn to love your body and that is okay.
3. Having body hair
It’s no secret, we all have body hair. People need to stop expecting us to shave every inch of our body to please them. If you want to grow all the hair on your body out, go for it. It is your body and if other’s don’t like it, that is their problem. But if you like to shave then that is fine too. Rock a bush if you want, it’s actually coming back in style. Plus, shaving and waxing can be painful and cause infections. But if going bare is your thing, go for it.
4. Exploring your sexuality
Girls are beautiful. It’s OK if you want to explore your sexuality and see if you feel more attracted physically and emotionally to boys or girls. Some people might think you are doing this for attention or because you hate men, but this is simply not true. It’s okay to experiment with whichever gender you aren’t usually with, but be sure to let them know that’s what you are doing. You may discover that you have been missing out.
5. Masturbating
Why is this such an uncomfortable topic for us to talk about? Come on, we all do it. So why is it natural when a guy does it, but dirty when a girl does? Female masturbation has a stigma attached to it for no apparent reason. Flicking the bean can be a great stress reliever and pain reliever. There are honestly no negative health consequences. And don’t be afraid to watch or read porn to help you out, there is nothing wrong with that. Nicole Davis, a college student, says: “Masturbate. Your partner will never know what turns you on if you don’t figure it out first.” So keep on enjoying yourself and don’t be ashamed to talk about it, it’s natural.
6. Enjoying sex
Somehow, girls who like sex have started being labeled “sluts.” Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure it’s not your job to judge other people’s sex lives. A girl can have sex with any guy or girl that she wants, as much as she wants, it is none of your business. Yes, guys sleep around and it is seen as a good thing, but when girls do it they are call names, but there are flaws on both ends. There is absolutely nothing wrong with having lots of sex and nothing wrong with not wanting to have sex.
7. Not wanting to have sex
You have absolutely zero obligation to have sex with someone. It doesn’t matter if someone buys you dinner, gives you gifts, buys you drinks, or anything else. You do not have to do anything you don’t want to. The word “prude” tends to be thrown around if a girl doesn’t want to have sex. As women, we are fighting a losing battle. If we have sex we are sluts, if we don’t we are prudes. The people who call you these things are simply insecure. In the end, you have to make your own decisions and do what makes you happy.
8. Not wearing a bra
Bras are uncomfortable so go without if you want to, or wear sports bras, but if you are more comfortable wearing a bra that’s fine too. Let the boobies fly free every once in a while and don’t be afraid of nipping. We all have nipples, why are girls the only ones who are told to cover them up? It’s not like they are some secret that only girls have. We have to continue to fight the battle against our nipples because they are beautiful and nothing to be ashamed of.
9. Being a powerful woman
As a powerful woman it is always hard to 1) Get to the highest level of your career and 2) find a man that will accept you as a powerful woman that may make more money than him. Why? I don’t know society sucks. But never ever pretend to be less than what you are to please anyone.
At the end of the day, you just need to do whatever makes you happy. Never forget, girls run the world!
10. Sleeping with a lot of people.
Oh the infinite arguments & double standards. We’ve heard them all; about the locker and the key, how the body is a temple…etc. But maybe, just maybe someone that sleeps around does have a lot of respect for herself and her body (and person). And because of that they want to keep their mind and body healthy by working out and enjoying themselves. If they protect themselves and are not doing it to please anyone else, who are we to judge?!
11. Wanting to wait for the right person, even if you’re 28 or 34.
As much as sleeping around is badly seen, you are also seen as deviant when you “keep it” longer than most people. The average age for losing your virginity is often between the late teens and early 20’s. If you’re still a virgin in your late 20’s it’s a bit weird and in your 30’s people are just sad for you. But why? Sex is a personal decision that concern no one in the world but you. If you’re waiting for something special, that’s okay.
11. Being a rape survivor or someone who has been abused.
You are not a victim! What happened to you isn’t you, what happened to you is part of you but isn’t all that you are. You don’t have to talk about it, but it doesn’t make you less of a human. If anything it makes you stronger and more able to deal with the hardships of life.
Hattip to The Tab, Thought Catalogue
