Christmas is a notoriously romantic time of year. A great opportunity to cosy up with someone special in front of a roaring fire and what’s not to love about Christmas Day with someone other than your parents.
However, appealing as relationships at Christmas are, there is a lot to be said for being single during the festive period.
From utilising that mistletoe to saying b***locks to it all and spending the 25th on a beach somewhere hot with nothing but a Pina Colada and good book to keep you company.
1. Christmas parties
Weddings, funerals, Christmas parties – occasions which often involve free alcohol, high emotions and amorous strangers.
A couple of spritzers and home by ten because your boyfriend’s complaining about how much you’ve been out lately – or a boozefest with three hundred colleagues you’ve never met before, a karaoke machine and the fit bloke from the Basingstoke office trying to snog you in the line up for the buffet.
Hashtag no brainer.
2. Fit co-workers
Talking of which, there is nothing like the festive season to bring the office hotties out of the woodwork.
3. Snogging randoms
Mistletoe – what’s not to love about the fail-safe snog-stick for randy office workers everywhere.
What the word ‘cringe’ was invented for.
4. Staying in
Don’t fancy another night in a reserved area of All Bar One – it’s cold, it’s dark, you’re single, you’re drinking red wine in your pyjamas and watching The Holiday on loop.
No judgment here.
5. Letting it all hang out
Because all self-respecting people start eating three and a half thousand calories a day on the first of December.
Looking sexy naked by the 25th? No thanks, love.
6. Saving money
Because *all* your boyfriend wants this year is a set of new golf clubs.
*Weeps*
7. Not being one half of an annoying couple
Good tidings and best wishes in M&S glittery Christmas cards from *insert your name* and *insert your boyfriend’s name* here.
Or
A Whatsapp group message sent on Boxing Day titled ‘thank f**k that’s over’
One of the above is not annoying.
8. Doing what the hell you want on Christmas Day
Vodka cocktails at 11am, a Chinese takeaway at 4pm, the walk of shame along Clapham high street from a bloke’s house you’ve never met before who you pulled on Christmas Eve – knock yourself out my single friend.
9. Bickering
Nothing kills the festive mood like a significant other gently reminding you that a bottle of port and two cherry brandy chasers might be a bit much before 11am.
Whatever, It’s Christmas!
10. Navel-gazing
Totally ignoring each other indefinitely or long walks for deep and meaningfuls about where your relationship is going — welcome to Boxing Day for couples.
Single folk? Did someone say Quality Street, Prosecco in pyjamas and Singin’ In The Rain?
*Resumes the position*
11. The New Year
Also known as the most popular month for new sign ups on dating apps.
Meaning that, after your relaxing break spent eating, drinking, snogging fit blokes and *not* over-analysing you can log back in on Tinder and find a whole new crop of newly single hotties.
*Happy* New Year.
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